David Tutera Gives Thanksgiving and Wedding Party Planning Tips for CELEBrations

Tonight, David Tutera is back with a new season of CELEBrations,giving viewers VIP access to parties he has thrown all year-long for star clients and well-known TV personalities.
In this third season, the CELEBrations include parties and charity events given by Vanessa Williams, Vivica A. Fox, Kim Coles, Ian Ziering, Cynthia Bailey, Big Ang Raiola and Reza Farahan.
“I like to draw my inspiration from all different sources and from my everyday surroundings,” Tutera told Parade.com in this exclusive interview. “Fashion is a big one for me because it tends to be a season or two ahead of bridal styles and I can interpret upcoming trends in my own way. I also like to look at pop culture, which has a big influence on trends. Lastly, I always look to nature for inspiration—the changing seasons and beautiful landscapes are the perfect inspiration when creating a wedding look.”
In tonight’s premiere episode, Tutera is tasked with planning a bridal shower for Williams, who will be joining the cast of The Good Wife in a recurring role.
But first, he took time from his schedule to give his best advice for upcoming parties, Thanksgiving celebrations and more.
What will we be privy to on David Tutera’s CELEBrations?
Canine Companions with Ian Ziering was a great charity event and definitely one filled with a star-studded guest list, including Real Housewives’ Kenya Moore from Atlanta and Kristen Taekman from New York, former Danity Kane singer/song writers Aubrey O’Day and Shannon Bex, Jodi Sweetin, known for her role as Stephanie in Full House, Chris Soules from The Bachelor, Tori Spelling and her husband Dean McDermott, and so many more!
Is there a piece of must-have advice that applies to both celebrity and non-celebrities who are planning an event? Something they have in common?
I would advise anyone planning an event to always have a surprise element. It doesn’t have to be something expensive, but there should be something totally unexpected. It could be a performing act, or even just a choreographed dance between you and someone special, but this is something that your guests will remember.
Something that celebrities and non-celebrities have in common is that in the midst of all the planning, they sometimes forget why they are celebrating and to relax and have a good time. If you have a good time, your guests will have a good time. You worked hard for everything to come together and when the day finally comes, you should be able to enjoy it!
What is the best place to start planning a party? The theme? The colors? The budget?
First thing’s first: Always start with your budget! Before you start planning decide on a budget and stick to it! A beautiful event can be planned for any amount of money, no matter how great or small. After numbers are all figured out, you can move on to the fun stuff! It isn’t all that important to have a theme, but, a color scheme is key!
For some brides, this is easy, they have had the colors picked out even before the groom entered the picture. But for others, choosing wedding colors can be a stressful process. A color wheel is a great tool to help you choose coordinating colors. Try to limit your colors to two or three, so things don’t get too jumbled. And, make sure to stay consistent with your colors throughout the wedding.
Best tips for decorating if you are not DIY and have a limited budget?
Candles, candles and more candles! They’re perfect all year long, and you can get them at almost any store. They’re so easy, affordable and available in different colors and styles. You can arrange them in clusters, spread them out along ledges or tables, or you can stick them in your other décor items. Simple touches like candlelight can enhance the whole ambiance of the event without putting a major hole in your pocket!
What is the biggest party faux pas in your opinion?
Every host wants their guests to remember their party, but you certainly do not want them to remember going home hungry. Whether you’re handling the food or the caterer, there should always be a sufficient amount of food for your guests, and then some! It’s better to have too much than not enough.
What is the best part of your job?
It’s really amazing to take a raw space with nothing but a floor, four walls and a ceiling, and turn it into something extraordinary. There are so many moving parts when planning an event; it’s just like putting a puzzle together. There are different vendors providing their own unique service, and when they come together, it’s like magic and everything falls perfectly into place. To see the end product is always a rewarding feeling and most of the time, it turns out better than I imagined.
The holidays are just around the corner. What ideas can you pass on for a great Thanksgiving gathering?
The holidays can creep up quickly and before you know it, you’re smack in the middle of it. Thanksgiving is a great holiday that requires a lot of prep, especially if you are hosting.
My advice for a successful Thanksgiving gathering is to get yourself organized as far in advance as possible! You need to remember that you also want to be a gracious host and not spend all of your time in the kitchen, as hard as that may sound. Instead, try designating members of your household to assist with different duties, so that you can also enjoy the day.
We all know that big turkey dinner can put you right into a food coma in the snap of a finger, so keep your guests moving and try serving dessert in a different location.
Adding some festive fall décor into the mix makes the home feel warm and welcoming and is always a great conversation starter—especially if you’ve made it yourself! Take advantage of the fall foliage and gather pinecones and berries right from your yard, along with cinnamon sticks and pumpkins to create a festive fall centerpiece or welcome wreath.
Can you share a Christmas tradition from your family?
Christmas is my favorite holiday and has always been a big deal in my family! One of my favorite traditions is decorating for the holidays, especially the Christmas trees throughout my home. I love the holiday so much that I can’t have just ONE tree! Each tree has its own theme and holds special memories.
For instance, I have a Disney tree, filled with all different ornaments that I’ve collected from every time I’ve visited the Disney Parks. I also LOVE butterflies, so of course, I have trees and lit-up garland and wreaths adorned with over 6,000 butterflies of different colors and sizes, and my daughter Cielo has her own tree embellished with all of her ornaments.

The third season of David Tutera’s CELEBrations premieres Friday, October 30 at 10 p.m. ET/PT on WE tv.

For Millennial Wedding Guests, Behaving Badly Falls Out of Favor

It’s a sloppy and unattractive visual that many have witnessed. A guest, be it at a bachelor or bachelorette party, a wedding reception or its after-party, has consumed too many drinks and is escorted out.
Where celebratory inebriation, egged on by films like “The Hangover,” was once thought of as a rite of passage, that sort of behavior is starting to change. Participants, planners and etiquette experts cite age, pervasive social media and a grudging new respect for responsibility and maturity as factors here.
While these occasions are by no means “immune from wild nights and partygoers,” said Harmony Walton, owner of the Bridal Bar, a wedding concierge service in Los Angeles, they “are a bit more refined than they were a decade ago.”
“Millennials are marrying later, so fewer weddings are turning into rowdy college parties,” Ms. Walton said.
Lonni Kushner, 27, of Melville, N.Y., went to 11 weddings this year, and based on her experience, booked a spa for a health-focused bachelorette party. Recently at a bachelorette party in the Bahamas, she said, “the bride got so sick the night before that she missed all of the next day’s activities because she was sleeping it off.”
Ms. Kushner recalled a similar incident in Rhode Island: “It was July, and 80 degrees. We partied during the day and then had to pull it together that night and power through it for the bride, and that’s just no fun.”
Women are not the only ones trying to curb their cocktail consumption. Nick DeRosa, 30, a construction project manager in Manhattan, said, “When a group of guys are together for a bachelor party, we definitely fall into bad behavior.”
“There’s pressure to drink a lot, but that has tapered off a bit,” Mr. DeRosa said. “Once you pass the 30-year line, you don’t want to be that sad, messy drunk guy. It’s embarrassing.”
Environment helps govern behavior, and it shapes what is anticipated of us, said Karen Sternheimer, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Southern California. “People are choosing more mature and sophisticated places to have their celebrations,” Ms. Sternheimer said.
“Vegas advertises that you can do whatever you want,” she said. “It’s an equal embarrassment opportunity. If you go to a spa for the weekend, drunken behavior won’t be appreciated or tolerated. Getting tanked at the spa is just bad form.”
Then there’s the bounce-back phenomenon, which seems to have a cutoff age. “Many of us are realizing we can’t party like we’re 22 and recover by the next morning,” Ms. Kushner said.
To reduce the risk that her own bachelorette party would end badly, Ms. Kushner, who got engaged after she and her boyfriend finished the New York City Marathon, had her bachelorette party at the Lodge at Woodloch, a spa resort in the Pocono Mountains.
“I really loved the idea of a healthy weekend: high-end, but low-fat cuisine, fitness classes, treatments,” Ms. Kushner said. The event coordinator planned nostalgic playground games (ring toss, jumping rope) in a lighthearted but competitive style. “My friends were so surprised by how much fun they had,” she said.
AdvertisementContinue reading the main storyAdvertisementContinue reading the main storyThe notion that Big Brother is watching from the web, along with the eyes of corporate America, is a reality that is also bearing down on millennials and others who are holding down jobs and are expected to perform in them.
As enticing and addictive as Facebook and Instagram have become, there’s also a pushback from those wanting to remain faceless and nameless. For these folks, being caught in compromising photographs in a posting on someone’s page that they didn’t O.K. is no longer acceptable.
“The problem with Instagram and Facebook is that they’re being used by career-minded people outside the original targeted audience — the college crowd — Ms. Sternheimer said. “Everyone is using it now, so smartphones are essentially monitoring our behavior,” she said. “People may be behaving better for fear of being captured doing something inappropriate without their consent.”
Ms. Sternheimer added that people are more careful about what they let others see, especially because they know that other employment opportunities can be hindered if they portray themselves negatively in either a work or social setting.
If the web is monitoring, it’s also educating us in good performance. “We get a lot of ideas from media,” said Anna Post, a co-author of “Emily Post’s Etiquette” and a spokeswoman for the Emily Post Institute in Burlington, Vt. “The generation before the Internet watched movies and learned how to behave from them,” she said, pointing to the John Hughes cult film “Sixteen Candles” as one example. “People acted a little drunk and goofy.”
Today, Ms. Post said, “Websites and magazines portray a far more accurate, more realistic reflection of what’s expected from us behaviorally at a wedding, and therefore people are acting better. Most people really want to get it right.”
The way parties are structured is also changing. Today’s festivities start with the welcome party, which morphs into the ceremony the following evening, which flows effortlessly into the four-hour postnuptial gala, followed by an after-party. Expect Sunday brunch to close the weekend.
“People don’t want to miss that part of the evening, and thus they’re learning to pace themselves,” said Maureen Farley, director of hospitality at the Plaza hotel in New York, which hosts approximately 60 weddings a year. Eighty percent of those events have after-parties, she said.
“These parties are marathons, not sprints,” Ms. Farley said. “And if they consume too much at the wedding, they won’t make it to the next leg, which is where the D.J. and dancing take place.” The after-parties often start at 1:30 a.m. and can run til 4 a.m.
What is being served is also helping to control the impulse to overindulge. A growing foodie culture in the millennial generation is putting emphasis on the quality of the meal, craft cocktails and other specialties, said Ms. Walton of the Bridal Bar.
“Guests are eating more and enjoying the drinks longer, causing fewer to act poorly or get sick toward the end of the night,” she said.

Still, Ms. Kushner, who was married on Oct. 24, said not everyone is ready to put down the bottle. “Some of my friends are afraid to break the mold,” she said. “They’re not willing to give up the wild and crazy weekends.”

For Millennial Wedding Guests, Behaving Badly Falls Out of Favor

It’s a sloppy and unattractive visual that many have witnessed. A guest, be it at a bachelor or bachelorette party, a wedding reception or its after-party, has consumed too many drinks and is escorted out.
Where celebratory inebriation, egged on by films like “The Hangover,” was once thought of as a rite of passage, that sort of behavior is starting to change. Participants, planners and etiquette experts cite age, pervasive social media and a grudging new respect for responsibility and maturity as factors here.
While these occasions are by no means “immune from wild nights and partygoers,” said Harmony Walton, owner of the Bridal Bar, a wedding concierge service in Los Angeles, they “are a bit more refined than they were a decade ago.”
“Millennials are marrying later, so fewer weddings are turning into rowdy college parties,” Ms. Walton said.
Lonni Kushner, 27, of Melville, N.Y., went to 11 weddings this year, and based on her experience, booked a spa for a health-focused bachelorette party. Recently at a bachelorette party in the Bahamas, she said, “the bride got so sick the night before that she missed all of the next day’s activities because she was sleeping it off.”
Ms. Kushner recalled a similar incident in Rhode Island: “It was July, and 80 degrees. We partied during the day and then had to pull it together that night and power through it for the bride, and that’s just no fun.”
Women are not the only ones trying to curb their cocktail consumption. Nick DeRosa, 30, a construction project manager in Manhattan, said, “When a group of guys are together for a bachelor party, we definitely fall into bad behavior.”
“There’s pressure to drink a lot, but that has tapered off a bit,” Mr. DeRosa said. “Once you pass the 30-year line, you don’t want to be that sad, messy drunk guy. It’s embarrassing.”
Environment helps govern behavior, and it shapes what is anticipated of us, said Karen Sternheimer, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Southern California. “People are choosing more mature and sophisticated places to have their celebrations,” Ms. Sternheimer said.
“Vegas advertises that you can do whatever you want,” she said. “It’s an equal embarrassment opportunity. If you go to a spa for the weekend, drunken behavior won’t be appreciated or tolerated. Getting tanked at the spa is just bad form.”
Then there’s the bounce-back phenomenon, which seems to have a cutoff age. “Many of us are realizing we can’t party like we’re 22 and recover by the next morning,” Ms. Kushner said.
To reduce the risk that her own bachelorette party would end badly, Ms. Kushner, who got engaged after she and her boyfriend finished the New York City Marathon, had her bachelorette party at the Lodge at Woodloch, a spa resort in the Pocono Mountains.
“I really loved the idea of a healthy weekend: high-end, but low-fat cuisine, fitness classes, treatments,” Ms. Kushner said. The event coordinator planned nostalgic playground games (ring toss, jumping rope) in a lighthearted but competitive style. “My friends were so surprised by how much fun they had,” she said.
AdvertisementContinue reading the main storyAdvertisementContinue reading the main storyThe notion that Big Brother is watching from the web, along with the eyes of corporate America, is a reality that is also bearing down on millennials and others who are holding down jobs and are expected to perform in them.
As enticing and addictive as Facebook and Instagram have become, there’s also a pushback from those wanting to remain faceless and nameless. For these folks, being caught in compromising photographs in a posting on someone’s page that they didn’t O.K. is no longer acceptable.
“The problem with Instagram and Facebook is that they’re being used by career-minded people outside the original targeted audience — the college crowd — Ms. Sternheimer said. “Everyone is using it now, so smartphones are essentially monitoring our behavior,” she said. “People may be behaving better for fear of being captured doing something inappropriate without their consent.”
Ms. Sternheimer added that people are more careful about what they let others see, especially because they know that other employment opportunities can be hindered if they portray themselves negatively in either a work or social setting.
If the web is monitoring, it’s also educating us in good performance. “We get a lot of ideas from media,” said Anna Post, a co-author of “Emily Post’s Etiquette” and a spokeswoman for the Emily Post Institute in Burlington, Vt. “The generation before the Internet watched movies and learned how to behave from them,” she said, pointing to the John Hughes cult film “Sixteen Candles” as one example. “People acted a little drunk and goofy.”
Today, Ms. Post said, “Websites and magazines portray a far more accurate, more realistic reflection of what’s expected from us behaviorally at a wedding, and therefore people are acting better. Most people really want to get it right.”
The way parties are structured is also changing. Today’s festivities start with the welcome party, which morphs into the ceremony the following evening, which flows effortlessly into the four-hour postnuptial gala, followed by an after-party. Expect Sunday brunch to close the weekend.
“People don’t want to miss that part of the evening, and thus they’re learning to pace themselves,” said Maureen Farley, director of hospitality at the Plaza hotel in New York, which hosts approximately 60 weddings a year. Eighty percent of those events have after-parties, she said.
“These parties are marathons, not sprints,” Ms. Farley said. “And if they consume too much at the wedding, they won’t make it to the next leg, which is where the D.J. and dancing take place.” The after-parties often start at 1:30 a.m. and can run til 4 a.m.
What is being served is also helping to control the impulse to overindulge. A growing foodie culture in the millennial generation is putting emphasis on the quality of the meal, craft cocktails and other specialties, said Ms. Walton of the Bridal Bar.
“Guests are eating more and enjoying the drinks longer, causing fewer to act poorly or get sick toward the end of the night,” she said.

Still, Ms. Kushner, who was married on Oct. 24, said not everyone is ready to put down the bottle. “Some of my friends are afraid to break the mold,” she said. “They’re not willing to give up the wild and crazy weekends.”

State-mandated pregnancy pamphlet in Va. wedding packets boggles newlyweds

The innocuous brochure was slipped into a marriage license packet, gifted by the Chesterfield Circuit Court to the newly wedded couple.
“You may not be ready to have a baby, but your body’s been preparing for years,” reads the pamphlet, which delves into pregnancy, birth defects and the importance of folic acid in prenatal vitamins.
But clients of Virginia wedding officiant Kimberly Kelly questioned why the courts have been tasked with distributing health information.
Kelly owns Dream A Little Dream Weddings and said a client was stunned when she recently received a brochure on pregnancy, birth defects and folic acid in her marriage license packet from Chesterfield Circuit Court.
“I think about same sex couples and I just don’t think it's appropriate,” Kelly said. “I know elderly couples that get married; even people who have cancer or some type of genetic disorder get married --but what if they can’t have a child?!”
She said that in the nearly eight years that she has been officiating for Dream A Little Dream Weddings she has never run into the brochure.
But the Chesterfield Circuit Court told Kelly that the brochures are a state mandate.
“Chesterfield County makes the publication about the role of folic acid in preventing birth defects available to marriage license applicants as required by the Code of Virginia,” Chesterfield Circuit Clerk Wendy Hughes said. “The county takes an extra step to include that publication in a packet of other information shared with all marriage license applicants.”
It was pointed out that the General Assembly first created and instituted the statute in 1999.
“These packets are made ahead of time and distributed as a courtesy to all applicants, to ensure everyone has access to the information,” Hughes said. “Other information in the packet includes a ceremonial wedding certificate and information about the marriage process to ensure it takes place in accordance with state requirements.”
A CBS 6 reporter looked up the Virginia statute and it directs every Circuit Court clerk to make the information available to all marriage license applicants.
Of the 10 different clerk's offices contacted by CBS 6, five said they had no mandate to put the brochures in with the marriage license information.
In the city of Richmond, officials simply put the brochures in a basket that’s on a counter. Anyone who wants the information is free to take it.
Henrico, Dinwiddie, Fluvanna, Amelia and Powhatan said they don’t give out the brochures. Some of them said they don’t even have the literature.
The Petersburg’s Circuit Court office said they selectively hand out the pamphelt because they know the information may not apply to everyone.
Goochland, Chesterfield and Hanover give them to every single couple.
“Not that I don’t think it’s a good program,” Kelly said. “I just think it's misplaced.”

Kelly said she would like to see the offices stop that practice of handing out those brochures, although the law is clearly spelled out.

Rodgers honeymoon tragedy: Heartbroken close friend who made wedding cake pays tribute to 'wonderful' couple

Lynette (26) and John (28) Rodgers died after getting into difficulties while out swimming together at Plettenberg Bay on the Western Cape on Friday.
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The couple were married on October 17 at Holywood's First Presbyterian Church after being together for the past four years.
They had just arrived in Plettenberg Bay, west of Port Elizabeth in the Western Cape, and were staying in the five-star Robberg Beach Lodge, next to the beach when tragedy struck.
Tributes have poured in for the popular couple.
In a joint statement the couple's families said that they had been left devastated.
An "old and dear" friend of Lynette who made their wedding cake shared a poignant tribute on her Facebook page Cake, Rattle and Roll and said her heart has been broken.
It was posted alongside a photo of the late couple cutting their cake.
It read: "It is with great sadness I post this picture, I had the utmost pleasure of being an old friend, wedding guest and cake maker for John and Lynette Rodgers who were taken far too soon last week in South Africa while on their honeymoon.
"I was so pleased to be asked to make the wedding cake by my old and dear friend Lynette and was thrilled to attend the wedding to her soul mate John - hearing and seeing the news regarding what has happened has broken my heart but I am SO glad to have known such beautiful people and participated in the happiest day of their devastatingly short lives.
"Lynette and John, rest in peace together and know that while you are gone you will never be forgotten for the wonderful, kind and generous spirited people you are. "
It has been liked more than 7,000 times with hundreds of people commenting on it.
One read: "Too wrong, too sad, too tragic utterly heartbreaking."
Post-mortem examinations are expected to be carried out on Lynette and John today and their families hope their bodies will be returned to Northern Ireland before the end of the week.
The joint statement from the couple's families said that their "happiness in sharing their recent wedding has been thoroughly devastated".
"It has come as a great shock to both the Reilly and Rodgers families to learn of the sudden and tragic events in South Africa, which have taken the lives of Lynette and John.

"Our happiness in sharing their recent wedding has been thoroughly devastated. Both were very dearly loved and brought us great joy."

Oregon tree house rooted in wedding fun

Anita Bolin literally went out on a limb when she decided to create an unconventional wedding venue.
Bolin, 58, and her husband Mike, 76, erected a 10-by-20-foot tree house on their five-acre property just outside Rainier. The "Tie the Knot Treehouse" offers a modest way to wed.
The couple, who both were widowed, said they were inspired to build the venue when they had difficulty planning a simple ceremony for themselves.
They didn't want a big wedding, Bolin said, but they didn't want a shotgun wedding in Vegas, either. They ultimately married at Lake Tahoe, but said it required substantial planning.
"We didn’t want a big wedding. We wanted something comfortable and small and intimate."
The couple, who is hosting their first wedding for a friend this week, charges $175 per ceremony. Bolin, a certified chaplain and minister, leads the service. Because space is limited, each ceremony is limited to 10 people besides the bride and groom.
A reception can take place in the yard surrounding the tree house, but Bolin said she's mainly focusing on small services, including short-notice ceremonies and even pet remembrances.
Elaborate weddings and use of wedding planners "really goes against our mission statement, which was to keep it reasonable and family-oriented and close," she said.
Mike Bolin and a friend began building the tree house in July. It took about six days to construct the building, and Bolin has spent the last couple months decorating the spot.
To reflect the Bolins' mission, the tree house itself is modest. Inside, there are six wooden chairs, an electric fireplace, a lectern and several burning candles. The bright yellow structure with tall, red doors and colorful glass windows is anchored to five trees. Stone fairies and thick trees with goofy faces hidden in their bark decorate the yard.
In addition to weddings, Bolin said she plans to host ceremonies for people experiencing a divorce or the end of a long relationship.
"Widows get a chance to grieve. They have a service. Their relationship is over. They're moving on with their life," she said. "But a lot of single women, especially if they’ve been married for 25, 30 years, feel lost."
"This gives them a chance to bring their friends and family, and say 'Here I am. I need your support. I’m starting my life. This is a new beginning,'" she added. "(The ceremony) gives it a little closure."
The venue also accommodates kids, which Bolin, a step parent, said is important to her. Lincoln Logs and other small toys are scattered near the tree house.
"It makes it so it’s something about them, too," she said.

"I really want people to have a family experience and feel like their life is starting out on the right foot."

Wedding dresses bond survivors of 3 mass shootings

Jane Dougherty makes it look easy, taking apart three layers of a wedding dress and putting it back together. Her expert hands move quickly between cutting, pinning and sewing.
"I do about a dozen a week," Dougherty said. "I've been doing this 13 years. That's a lot of dresses."
Dougherty started sewing when she was 6 years old. By third grade, she was making her own clothes.
She made her first wedding dress in 1981 for her sister, Mary Sherlach.
"I never made a wedding gown before, but she had faith in me," Dougherty said. "That's where it all began."
Dougherty does all of her sewing in her basement. She sews and watches the news.
"I was very aware of the shootings, I wasn't somebody who was oblivious to shootings," she said. "I just thought there is more and more and they're getting closer and closer. [In] December it came real close and took my sister."
Dougherty lost her sister Mary in the December 2012 Sandy Hook shooting.
"It took me a year to care again because it seemed unimportant to me," Dougherty said of her alteration work. "Getting involved in gun sense law and becoming an activist was so much more important."
The Sandy Hook tragedy inducted Dougherty into a club of survivors.
"They're my tribe, they are my tribe," she said. "When I'm with them, I can express my anger, my sadness, my guilt, whatever I'm feeling. I can express it with them easier than I can at home."
That's how Dougherty met Coni Sanders and Megan Sullivan-Jenks. Coni's dad Dave Sanders was killed in the Columbine shooting. Megan lost her brother Alex Sullivan in the Aurora movie theater shooting.
"It's one of those things when you go through something this horrible, you just kind of gravitate towards the people, it's almost like you can feel the pain," Sanders said. "Even though we don't know each other terribly well, it just feels comfortable because you know that person has been where you've been. With Jane and Megan, you kind of naturally gravitate towards each other."
The three have done some activism work together -- and then it came time for Sanders and Sullivan-Jenks to get married.
Dougherty saw some Facebook posts from both women that said neither were having a fantastic time with wedding dress shopping. Sanders didn't find anything she liked and Sullivan-Jenks was in the middle of the Aurora theater shooting trial.
Dougherty offered to help. After all, they were her tribe, and it was only fitting.
"We got this dress and it needed [to be] altered," Sanders said. "It was so cool to have somebody that could help me, that knew that it was going to be hard for me to get married without him there."
"I don't think I would've trusted anyone else to do the alterations other than Jane," Sullivan-Jenks said. "I knew she cared about it as much as I did. And wanted to put everything that she could into it to make it my special day."
The weddings were perfect, as perfect as they can be. And the love Dougherty put into their special days just brought the tribe closer.
"We're bonded, even if I have to get married again," Sanders said.
"I'm not planning another wedding," Sullivan-Jenks replied.
"I do other dresses," Dougherty joked.
The three women are part of the Everytown Survivor Network, which brings together Americans who have been personally affected by gun violence to build a community of support and empower them to become leaders in the gun violence prevention movement.

The Survivor Network connects loved ones of victims and survivors to advocate for solutions to prevent the gun violence that kills 88 Americans and injures hundreds more every day. The Survivor Network, along with Moms Demand Action for Gun Sense in America and Mayors Against Illegal Guns, is part of Everytown for Gun Safety, the largest gun violence prevention organization in the country with more than three million members and more than 40,000 donors.

How This Bride Restored Her 120-Year-Old Family Heirloom Wedding Dress

This bride was anything but blue in September because she had the ultimate “something borrowed.”
Abby Curtis, nee Kingston, is the 11th bride in her family to wear this lacy Victorian 120-year-old couture wedding gown on her big day.
“It is my great-great grandmother’s dress from 1895,” Abby, 30, told ABC News of the family heirloom. “I will be the 11th bride to wear it.”
Pennsylvania Woman Will Be the 11th Person in Her Family to Wear 120-Year-Old Heirloom Wedding Dress
But Abby never dreamed she’d be able to wear the dress, since it hadn’t been properly cleaned in more than century.
“It was this deep beige color, not very bridal,” she explained. “I put it on and I thought, ‘There is just no way.’”
But there was a way.
“We did keep the original Belgian lace on here,” Abby said.
She enlisted the help of designer Deborah LoPresti of Easton, Pa., to come to the rescue, who tirelessly worked for more than 200 hours to restore the dress.
“We opened the seams in the dress and put in new fabric strips underneath and fused the new fabric to the old fabric so that it would hold together,” LoPresti recalled.
The dress is especially sentimental to Kingston’s mom, Leslie, who wore the gown at her wedding 38 years ago.
“Who would have though that a dress 120 years later could still be worn by a bride?,” her mother asked. “It’s a magical dress.”
Because of its fragility, Kingston only wore the vintage heirloom dress for the cocktail party and to sign her official marriage license to her now-husband, Jason Curtis, so that she’d still be legally married in the gown. For her actual ceremony however, she wore a new Rivini wedding gown.
“I'm equally as excited to have two dresses to wear on my wedding day to incorporate something old, something borrowed and something new,” she explained in September.
Abby’s “something blue” was her grandmother’s blue star sapphire ring.
So how can the everyday woman modernize a vintage wedding gown? The first trick is to change the high neckline.
“It could be made into a low V, or it could be scooped,” said LoPresti. “Or it could even be made strapless, if that’s what she chooses.”
Next, get rid of the long, lacy sleeves and make a more modern cap sleeve.
And lastly, it’s all about the fit.
“It should fit just like a brand new gown,” LoPresti explained.

Fortunately for this blushing bride, the designer was able to turn the vintage dress into the perfect fit for her big day on Oct. 17 at The Lake House Inn in Perkasie, Pa.

Personalize Your Las Vegas Wedding Vows`

There are so many different possibilities for getting hitched in Las Vegas. From Elvis impersonators to elegant chapels, from themed weddings to drive by "I dos," the options are limitless. There is one thing you can do in almost any kind of ceremony that would truly honor the uniqueness of your union -- include personal vows.
Since my hubby is also a wedding officiant and we preside over so many unique weddings, we once renewed our own wedding vows in Las Vegas, with an Elvis impersonator who is the only ordained Elvis in town. We are not fans of gambling at all but we have a great appreciation for Las Vegas wedding chapels.
Personalized vows are meant to provide a sacred moment in which you can express your truest feeling for each other. They can be part of even the wackiest wedding. You may be driving in a pink Cadillac or in the roller coaster atop the Stratosphere ... no matter, the vows can still be real! Speak with your officiant (or the person who arranges your ceremony) in advance, whenever possible, about where vows fit into your ceremony.
For our vow renewal, my husband did all his vows using titles and lines from Elvis songs, and they still held deep meaning. And it was fun to share something so personal in the ceremony.
Here are some tips for writing your Las Vegas wedding vows:
Ways to say I love you: There are many ways to weave vows into your ceremony. For example, your vows can be repeat-after-the-officiant style or they can be read to one another. You can utter them as part of your I dos, or speak them when you exchange rings. You can each decide on different vow, or share the same vows. You can even speak the same vow to one another simultaneously; or you can read from one long vow or statement, with bride and groom alternating lines. If you don't want to say much, you can ask to include the promises you would like to make in a longer question of intent (which your officiant will ask you), to which you only have to answer "I do." It's best not to try to memorize your vows. On your wedding day, the mind goes into Wedding La-La Land ... it is too much to ask of yourself.
Creative ways to express your commitment: You can find your vows in poetry, popular songs or even greeting cards. You can also source ideas from the faiths or cultures you were born into. For example, from the Jewish tradition comes the soulful line from Song of Solomon, "I am my beloveds, and my beloved it mine" and the concept of soul mates can be found in the Zohar or the Bible. Some couples adapt vows from the 7 Steps (known as Saptapadi) in the Hindu faith, such as "We will share each other's joys and sorrows with courage and strength." You can find lovely material from any spiritual tradition and adapt it into your vows.
Write your own vows. If you do want to write your own vows, take a moment to reconnect to the energy and magic that made you want to marry this person, and let the feelings flow. Jot down some notes:
1. What do you love about this man/woman?
2. What feeling pour over you when you think of his/her love for you?
3. What are your hopes and dreams for your married life?
4. What promises would you like to make?
Next, write a first draft. Begin by sharing why you love him/her (including cute and funny reasons) and letting him/her know how he/she makes you feel. Next, share things you look forward to experiencing together. Sprinkle in promises you would like to make. Summarize by sharing how grateful you are for his/her love and the opportunity to share your lives. Then go through the first draft; edit or add in new thoughts. Don't be afraid to use humor - if that's your style. ("I promise never to change the channel when the Yankee's are on," for example).

Speak from the heart: No matter what kind of wedding you opt for, or what kind of vows you choose, let your sentiments come from the heart. They do not have to be long. Approach them with a K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple, Sweetheart) and make them real. Those are the BEST wedding vows.

How Indiana Pizza Shop Responded After Being Tricked Into ‘Catering’ Gay Wedding

Much of the media today roundly disparage any business-person who even voices his or her religious beliefs regarding same-sex marriage. This is the consistent narrative by which many presumptuously judge small business owners’ (often wedding vendors) motives in affirming their religious convictions as animating their business lives.
Critics reject out of hand their claims that they are simply living out their faith with love and can’t be a part of a wedding ceremony that violates their consciences.
When the owners of Memories Pizza—a small-town pizzeria in Indiana—were posed a hypothetical question about whether they would cater a gay wedding last year, the “intolerance” of their simple response that they would not resulted in a threat to burn down their shop.
They did not answer threats with threats, but continued to calmly explain that they would happily serve gay customers; they just didn’t want to be a part of the wedding. Of course, none of this mattered to those not interested in seeking the facts.
It now appears that a man ordered two pizzas from Memories Pizza, without stating his reasons (as is quite normal when ordering pizza), and brought them back to serve at his same-sex wedding. He recorded the event on video and claimed that Memories “catered” his gay wedding—without knowing it.
While the charade itself is sort of childish, it does hold several lessons for us. Let us first consider that, in response to the video, Memories owner Kevin O’Connor has …
Threatened to burn something down? Nope.
Called someone a bigot? Nope.
He’s actually not really too interested in the actions of his customer after selling him the pizza.
So what’s the point?
It is an undisputed fact that Memories Pizza served a man regardless of his sexual relationships. Its owners did not deny him service. They didn’t “turn him away.” They didn’t quiz the man when he came in, asking whether he identified as a homosexual or what he would use the pizza for.
Those truly seeking to understand the conflicts in the “wedding vendor cases” should study what happened here, for they will see that no one involved is interested in simply turning away customers based on how they identify sexually.
People are interested in exercising the teachings of their faith regarding marriage, and in continuing to live quiet and peaceful lives in harmony with their communities, as they have been doing for years. They haven’t sought a fight; it has come to them.
What else can we learn?
It’s important to note that Kevin O’Connor did not respond in an apoplectic manner with claims of “my conscience was violated here!” Conscience is violated not merely by the occurrence of events; there must be knowledge of what one is getting oneself into or being forced to participate in. It must be emphasized that the wedding vendors around the country who are asserting their religious freedom are doing so because they are knowingly being forced to participate in an act that violates their conscience, not because a customer disagrees with them on matters of sexuality.
Even then, Kevin would have had no problem serving the customer the pizzas even if he knew who he was. “We weren’t catering to their wedding,” Kevin said. “They were picking [pizzas] up.” Kevin has no problem with serving a person in his shop, whether or not that person identifies as gay.
For those who truly care to understand what the wedding vendors are seeking in these cases, there is an important lesson here. Kevin O’Connor’s indifference in this matter can be contrasted with his kind but firm refusal to participate in a same-sex wedding when asked earlier this year.
He is not asking to “turn away” people. He is only asking that he not be forced to violate his conscience by knowingly participating in a wedding ceremony that runs counter to his religious beliefs. Memories Pizza’s unproblematic “catering” of the same-sex wedding in this case shows as much. Those who sincerely care to understand more about such religious freedom claims can learn from Kevin’s actions, which are an important teaching moment on the role of conscience in the “wedding vendor cases” and beyond.
The small business owners involved in these matters are not asking for a “blank check” to do whatever they want. They are advancing sincere conscience claims against being forced to knowingly use their businesses for certain ends, and they are often happy to forgo the lost income and even refer the potential customers to another business where they can find what they need.

As long as we live in a democracy, people will have differing views on moral questions. The model of tolerance displayed by Kevin O’Connor is as good as any for how we can live together with those differences.

Friends of dying bride launch fundraising appeal to give her wedding and honeymoon of her dreams

Friends of Marie Kenfick Henry Joe Parfitt and Michelle Newport have launched a fundraising page to raise £6,500 to give her the big day she has always wanted.
Two years ago a lung transplant seemed to have saved Marie Kenfick Henry’s life.
Before surgery, crippling Pulmonary Fibrosis and Polymyositis had seen her constantly fighting for breath, reliant on oxygen tanks and a mobility scooter.
But blessed with a new lease of life, and able to live a normal existence again, the 34 year old from Port Talbot, met the love of her life Sean Piles.
In September though, five months after getting engaged , the pair were dealt heartbreaking news.
Marie’s body was rejecting the new organ.
With further surgery ruled out, the bride-to-be now has no way of knowing how long her remaining overworked and damaged lung can cope, reports Wales Online .
Now her friends Joe Parfitt and Michelle Newport have launched a fundraising page to raise £6,500 to give her the big day she has always wanted.
And with more than £1,500 raised in a day they are even hoping to send them on honeymoon.
Joe, 34, said: “I’ve just been speaking to Marie and we are both just completely overwhelmed by people’s generosity.
“It’s not just the money being donated, I’ve been on the phone all morning, inundated with people offering their services for the wedding, hair, cake - more or less everything seems to be sorted already except for the venue.
“And it is so important for me to get this right, to deliver what I suppose is her dying wish.”
He added: “She would have hoped to have a long time to get money together and plan her wedding - but unfortunately she doesn’t have that luxury now.
“We want to help Marie fulfil every girl’s dream to get married and have the fairytale wedding she so rightly deserves.”
Marie, a former factory worker, was first diagnosed with Pulmonary Fibrosis and Polymyositis in 2006 after the miscarriage of her first child.
After tests to establish why she had lost her unborn baby boy, doctors found she had the rare lung condition, which causes scarring of the lungs and the degeneration of skeletal muscle.
If the funds can be raised it is currently hoped the wedding will take place next February.
Any excess funds will go towards the couple’s honeymoon.
Joe said: “We don’t know how long she’s got, it’s basically a case of waiting to see how long her remaining lung can cope before it fails.
“Marie used to be the life and soul, but obviously when she was first diagnosed everything changed.
“She was using oxygen and having to rely on moving around with a mobility scooter.
“The transplant changed all that, it brought the old Marie back, which makes what happened next even more devastating.
“Before the transplant she had two scarred lungs and when it failed she was left with just one - so in a sense she is worse off now that she was before the transplant.”
He added: “She is the most amazing person I have ever met.
“She is still so positive, she still does whatever she wants. It just takes her little longer.
“She is a complete inspiration and Sean is just perfect for her.
“It is heartbreaking for him and yet he has not shown any fear in dealing with the situation.

He just wants to marry Marie.”

Most wedding advice is worthless. So here's some wedding advice

I am not exactly what you'd call a wedding expert, but I've seen some weddings in my day. I got married once — it's still sticking, so I haven't needed to re-up. I have been the officiant at three weddings, as a reverend of the Universal Life Church. (You too can be ordained! Takes about five minutes.) All the weddings I presided were well-reviewed, though you'll have to trust me on that, as I don't yet have a Yelp page.
Also, I've been to lots of weddings. And I have some thoughts and tips to share with those of you pondering a wedding in the future.
The key to a good wedding is the feeling
For all the disagreements prospective spouses have over location, size, duration, and decoration, everyone who gets married wants the same thing out of their wedding: a good feeling.
People getting married want to feel supported, loved, and celebrated at their wedding. They want a sense of moment, of significance, that reflects the depth of their commitment. They want people to cry and laugh and remember. They want a good feeling.
The problem is, we feel weird and vulnerable talking about what we really want — "please come celebrate me and my spouse and make us feel special" — so we turn our anxiety toward trappings, toward larding the day with fanciness or cuteness. We hope it will translate into a good feeling.
Unfortunately, as anyone who has been to a few weddings surely knows, there is little correlation between trappings and feeling. I've been to extremely elaborate weddings that went by in a semi-formal haze, with no chance to settle in and feel anything. And I've been to low-budget, homemade weddings that were incredibly meaningful.
It's not so much overdoing things — though that's a real problem, not only for the big traditional white weddings but for the artisanal Etsy-style weddings getting so popular these days — as failing to attend to the most important things, letting expectations or pressure shape the essence of the event.
Here's the thing: For those of us with no (or weak) religious affiliation, the only official part of getting married is getting a marriage certificate at the courthouse. It's just a change of tax status. Anything else you want to bring to it — exchanging engagement rings, bachelor(ette) parties, a ceremony, an officiant, a best (wo)man, vows, kisses, first dances — is voluntary.
It can be fun to tap into that stuff. Widely shared and understood rituals have a kind of pre-existing weight behind them and can quickly create a sense of ceremony. But all of them can be tweaked, adapted, or abandoned at will.
There's nothing wrong traditional weddings, for people who enjoy that sort of thing. I've been to some great ones. But I've also definitely been to some weddings where the couple seemed to be going through a set of exercises, checking boxes, because they (or their families) thought they had to.
People are different, so there's not really much generic advice to give about weddings. The thing to remember is simply that you deserve to have that feeling, whatever that means for you and your spouse. Whether it's big and beautiful and awe-inspiring or low-key and genial, at the edge of a canyon or in a friend's living room, the social event of the season or a handful of friends and family — talk about what feeling you want and construct a day around that. Don't agree to anything that doesn't serve it.
Lots of people will have lots of ideas. And there's a whole industry devoted to hoovering money out you by subtly nudging you to compare your wedding with other people's. But only you know what feeling you want; make that your North Star.
I got the feeling I wanted at my wedding(s) more or less by accident, but I learned a couple of things along the way. So that this post isn't hopelessly vague, I have two pieces of semi-specific advice to share, which I'll illustrate by way of telling my own story.
Get people together as long before the ceremony as possible
I proposed to my wife in March 2001, one year to the day after we’d first gotten together. Improbably, she said yes.
Weeks later, as we were discussing the wedding, I noted that my bi-annual family reunion with my mom’s side of the family — something we’ve been doing every other year since 1974 — was coming up in July, some three months hence. "Why don’t we just get married there?" I asked. Even more improbably, my wife, who had never met most of the forty-some people expected to attend, said yes again. (Protip: marry a cool person.)
The reunion is a week long, held in a somewhat run-down little state park in Tennessee. We all arrived on Monday; the wedding was on Friday. In between, some of my old college friends came down. Her family and a few friends flew out from Seattle. We all settled in, took some hikes, swam in some rivers, played some Password, and drank some cheap canned beer. Everyone got to know everyone else, had some laughs.
When the day came, so did an enormous, torrential thunderstorm. Our picture-perfect outdoor ceremony, slated for the giant patio next to the restaurant, got scuttled. Instead we crammed everyone into one of the cabins, which featured dirty floors and awful (literally not changed since 1974) faux-Native American drapes, which now feature in all our wedding photos.
It was the photographer who ended up starting the ceremony, since no one else knew what was going on. I found out things had started when I heard the wedding march and saw my lovely bride squeezing out of the hallway from the bedroom. I was drinking a Bud Light at the time. My pianist (and brother) was my best man and later had to crawl over several people to get me the ring.
But I got it, and we got married, in the corner by the terrible drapes. Later, we all went outside with our clinking whiskeys, into the crisp air that thunderstorms leave behind in the South, and waved sparklers against the darkening sky. It was great. It was us. (And I bet the whole thing, from cabin to dress to cake, didn’t run more than $2,000.)
As I’ve attended (and officiated) more weddings over the years, I’ve realized in retrospect that we did one big thing right. The key turned out to be that everyone involved in the wedding got to hang out for a good while before the event. Everyone got past the awkward introductory conversations and got comfortable.
There was some sense of build-up and anticipation, which we all got to experience together. When the event came, everyone was fully present for it. And the next day, we all got up and went paddle-boating, enjoying the heady bliss of aftermath. The wedding ceremony turned out not to be the event, but the culmination of the event, and it felt that way.
The most jarring and least memorable weddings I’ve been to happen like this: you arrive, get out of your car, mill about for an awkward minute or two with a crowd of people you only vaguely know, get ushered to a seat, and a ceremony starts. Something something, thee I wed, kiss, clap, it’s over. Wait, what happened?
It’s only after the ceremony that people can wander around and chat. And it's usually only toward the end of the reception that people are drunk enough to actually relax. The ceremony itself comes to seem like a weird blur.
Not many people can manage a week-long wedding event, obviously. But two or three days isn't crazy, even if only for a core group of family and friends. It makes a big difference if people arrive to find a happy, relaxed vibe already established.
Even if a multi-day event is off the table, it's possible not to jam guests straight into the ceremony as they arrive. There’s no law that says ceremony first. Have some games and toasts and music and maybe even a meal before the ceremony. Let people settle in, so they can be present for the moment. It’s only going to happen once.
Actually, wait, that might not be true.
Break it up into multiple events
The one drawback to getting married in Tennessee is that it's a long way from Seattle, where my wife and I lived and had most of our social life.
We knew lots of Southern friends and family wouldn’t be able to make it out to Seattle. And we knew lots of our friends wouldn’t be able to make it down to Tennessee. A conundrum.
Lots of couples have this problem: more than one life, more than one set of people, more than one place. The great pressure of a wedding is that all those lives and people are supposed to cram into a single place on a single day. Sometimes it's not possible, because of money or geographical distance. Sometimes it's not advisable, because certain people should never be in the same room together (you know who I'm talking about). Either way, it seems like something has to be sacrificed.
Our solution was to get married twice, once in each place.
The first one, in Tennessee, was, I suppose, the "real wedding," with my childhood minister as officiant. That's the county stamped on my marriage certificate.
Nonetheless, a week after that wedding, in Seattle, we hauled our suit and dress out of our honeymoon luggage and put them back on. We did the whole thing over again: were wed by an officiant (this time a friend), exchanged vows and rings, were declared man and wife, and had another big party, this one with all our west coast friends.
It turned out to be a great idea. The two lives, the two sets of people, meant two different feelings — roots on one end, branches on the other. If they'd had to share an event, neither would have been done justice. As it was, we were able to give each feeling our full attention, to really take it in. Splitting the event turned out to double the joy.
And by the end, we felt extremely married.
Obviously, two weddings is not for everyone. Indeed the very notion may horrify people currently contemplating the stress and expense of just one wedding. The key for us was to keep them both cheap and low-key (though the booze alone in Seattle was probably more than the Tennessee wedding).
Some people take the whole married-by-a-preacher (or priest, rabbi, etc.) thing more seriously than I do and find the idea of having two ceremonies weird, or tacky, or false. That's fine. It doesn't have to be two weddings.
The point is just to take some of the pressure off The Wedding, which already has to bear a ton of it. It can be crazy-making to have such a bundle of hopes, expectations, and anxieties wrapped up in one day. I've seen weddings where participants (including the people getting married) are so taut with nervous worry that they only relax when it's over. This thing they planned and thought about for so long ... and they were never fully present for it.
Splitting that singular event up into multiple events can take some of the pressure off. It can be two ceremonies, like we did. It can be one "real" wedding for family and then some other sort of homemade ceremony/party for friends. It can be inviting one set of people to the rehearsal dinner the night before and another set of people to a post-wedding party the day after.
Getting married is a big deal. When you take someone on as a life partner, in some small way it remakes all your relationships, with friends and family alike. You return to them as part of a pair, a molecule where there was once two atoms. It's nice to be able to check in with all the people you care about, to share your joy and receive their blessings. That process can't always been squeezed into a single event. So remember that it doesn't have to be; you can spread it out.
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Marriage is awesome. I'm a big fan. And a wedding, done right, can kick your marriage off with a jubilant blast. No one will remember the flowers you chose, the hors d'oeuvres you served, or that cute vintage typewriter you found for people to write wedding messages on. They will remember the feeling. Focus on that.

Wine of the Week: Wedding wines to fall in love with

If April showers bring May flowers, then October brides get showered with colorful leaves and crisp autumn air.
According to the American Association of Certified Wedding Planners, a growing number of couples are opting for fall weddings. Many of these weddings are destination events, with venues a few hours away or on another continent.
There also seems to be a greater emphasis on shorter ceremonies and longer receptions. And with the demographic shifting toward couples getting hitched at older ages, there is more disposable income spent on celebrating the nuptials — including the wine.
Since one of my own friends is getting ready to walk down the aisle with her longtime partner, I thought it would be fitting to provide a few suggestions on hot wines for cool wedding receptions.
Sparkling wines are a great way to get guests into a festive mood and prosecco is a good choice, since the wine is often light and bright and usually fall into the “inexpensive-to-reasonable” price range.
Try the Non-Vintage La Tordera Cuvee di Gabry Spumante Extra Dry Rosato from Veneto, Italy, which actually has some merlot grapes used in this unusual, but delicious blend. It’s creamy on the front of the palate, with loads of strawberry and nectarine flavors and has a pleasantly off-dry finish, which features a hint of citrus that keeps the palate clean and fresh. $18
During warmer months I really enjoy a nice pinot grigio. The high acidity and low price ($9) in the2008 Ruffino “Lumina” Pinot Grigio from Venezia Giulia, Italy — made from grapes grown in the Fruili Venezia Giulia region — keeps the delicious notes of pear, green plums and citrus fruit on the medium-bodied, well-balanced frame bright and refreshing.
During cooler weather, a versatile white wine comes in handy. I really like Rhone white varietals for this assignment and the 2013 Horton Vineyards “Tower Series” Viognier from Orange, Virginia, is about as good as this domestic version gets. Beautiful scents of gardenia and apricot float on the fragrant bouquet while luscious flavors of ripe peach, apricot and papaya glide over the tongue on the way to the long and elegant finish. This wine is a remarkable value. $18
One of the most versatile and often overlooked reds in the wine world is merlot. It has a tendency to be powerful enough to pair with a variety of beef preparations yet elegant enough to enjoy on its own. The 2012 Matanzas Creek merlot from Sonoma County, California, offers up a lot of wine for the money. The complex nose features scents of dark berry, black plum and vanilla. The wine feels expansive and round in the mouth where layers of black plum, dark cherry, black currant and earthy notes integrate with soft tannins to provide a graceful and lengthy finish. $22

Last, but certainly not least, is the wedding toast. While there are many great sparkling wines available, personally, I think Champagne — real French Champagne with a capital “C” — is the way to go. There’s just something about Champagne that adds just that extra touch of class to any special occasion, and weddings are about as special as occasions get. The Nonvintage Laurent Perrier Brutis great Champagne to toast with. The pretty aromas of brioche toast, candied ginger and wet stone are charming. The delicate bubbles carry flavors of apple, nectarine and toast over the entire palate and the semi-dry structure is a nice match with — or without — wedding cake. Considering you can generally get twelve glasses of Champagne per bottle, the $35 price tag is still reasonable.

Newlyweds Stress Over Wedding Photo Delivery

An exciting day turned into weeks of stress and anger for a newlywed. She paid a lot of money up front for wedding photos and items that go with them. But a Six On Your Side investigation into the photography company doesn't paint a pretty picture.
Shayla O'Brien didn't bring home her wedding photos in an album but on a flash drive and getting it took a Six On Your Side name drop. She said, "It was a huge ordeal and I don't think I would have got it if I wouldn't have said I was going to come to you guys, at Six On Your Side."
An Omaha freelance photographer working for Unveil Loft Wedding Photography based in Colorado feared the company would take legal action but finally agreed to release Shayla's wedding pictures, on a flash drive.
However Unveil Loft still owes Shayla an expensive album, wall display and other items as part of her prepaid $1,700 wedding photo package. The newlywed said, "Its been really stressful you know, we're trying to be newlyweds and enjoy this time together and its been nothing but stressand tears because of this."
Unveil Loft hires freelancers to photograph weddings and send digital proofs to the company based in Colorado which took payment from couples.
The Better Business Bureau gives Unveil Loft of Colorado an "F" rating due to several complaints of undelivered prepaid wedding photo packages. The company sent the BBB an email claiming its closed and filed bankruptcy.
Omaha Better Business Bureau President Jim Hegarty said, "The complaints are piling up and the problem is the company is not responding. So to just not do anything is what i find deplorable."
Emails from other brides tell of heartache over still undelivered pictures. Shayla O'Brien said, "There's tons of brides that are going through the same thing i am and they don't have their photos yet."
Obtaining her wedding pictures was hardly a snap so Shayla isn't hopeful of getting her complete prepaid wedding package from a photography company with a darkening background.
The claim of bankruptcy by Unveil Loft of Colorado can't be verified. The phone number for the company is disconnected and ouremail has not been answered.

Anyone still owed wedding packages should contact the better business bureau. Hopefully an agreement to release pictures can be worked out eventually.

Jordanian Couple Shares Wedding Feast With Over 200 Refugees

A newly married couple in Jordan made their wedding day even more magical by sharing their first dinner as husband and wife with over 200 refugees living in the country's capital.
Newlyweds Mutaz Mango and Basma Omar teamed up with local nonprofit Collateral Repair Project to invite refugees from Amman's Hashmi al-Shamali neighborhood to their wedding party on Oct. 2.
At the party at Amman's King Ghazi Hotel, the newlyweds and their guests ate, danced and watched performances by local dance troupes. The couple also distributed food vouchers to the refugees a few days after the event.
“When we first walked in [to the party], we were overwhelmed with so many people who were genuinely happy for us,” Mango told The Jordan Times earlier this month. “Real human joy has no borders.”
A Jordanian couple invited over 200 refugees from Amman's Hashmi al-Shamali neighborhood to their wedding party on Oct. 2.
Elena Habersky, program manager at the Collateral Repair Project, told The WorldPost in an email Wednesday that the refugees came from countries including Syria, Iraq, Palestine, Sudan, Somalia, Yemen and Egypt.
"Mutaz and Basma were keen to help by providing food to these refugee families, since not having food is a critical trigger for many families in the Collateral Repair Project community to take risky decisions, like pulling children out of school to beg on the streets or even returning back to their war torn countries," Habersky wrote.
"Unable to work by law and using all their saved money for rent and food, after a few months, it can become near impossible for a family to put food on the table or pay their rent as their savings are all but gone," she added.
Syrian refugees alone make up 20 percent of Jordan's population, King Abdullah II told the U.N. General Assembly in September. The country, which has a population of 6.6 millionpeople, is also facing considerable strains on its resources, per the U.N.'s 2015 Global Appeal Update.
Mango and Omar came up with the idea to invite the refugees to their wedding after the United Nations' World Food Program cut food aid to almost all urban refugees in Jordan, Habersky explained. The U.N. announced Sept. 4 that it had stopped food aid to about 229,000 Syrian refugees in Jordan due to a lack of funding.

The couple's goodwill goes beyond the wedding party. Mango, Omar and the Collateral Repair Project plan to use the money remaining from the celebrations to fundraise projects that would benefit the neighborhood's refugees, although they haven't decided on what particular initiatives they will fund. The bride, who works at a tailor's shop, also plans to distribute sewing machines to women in the neighborhood.

Quadriplegic man shares first dance with wife two years after wedding

A Florida couple who wed in 2013 finally got the chance to share their first dance after the groom, who was paralyzed in a 2009 car accident, stood up for the first time during a physical therapy session this month.
Lauren and Joel Jackson, both 26, met as teenagers in South Carolina, according to the couple’s blog. Though they occasionally lost touch and became involved with other people, a visit after the car accident reignited something between them, Lauren wrote.
The accident, which killed another passenger, separated Joel’s spine from his head, broke his jaw and robbed him of his ability to speak, NBC News reported.He was placed in a coma while doctors worked to fuse his spine together.
“As I understand it, the doctors just said, ‘this is as good as his life is ever going to be. Make him comfortable,’” Lauren told the news site.
But Lauren continued to visit and they communicated with equipment that relied on Joel’s eyes to operate a computer. They reunited as friends in 2009, leading to their marriage in September 2013. Joel mouthed “I do,” during their vows and Lauren sat on his lap for their first dance to the song “I’ll Be” by Edwin McCain.
“But I told him, ‘When you can talk, I want to renew our vows. And when you can walk, I want you to dance with me,” Lauren told Joel, according to NBC News.
Finally, at Brooks Rehabilitation Center in Jacksonville, with Joel suspended from a body weigh-support system, the couple shared the first dance Lauren asked for.
Joel told NBC News with the help of a computer that the dance was “euphoric.”
“The little things mean so much to us,” Lauren told the news station.
Bob McIver, manager of Brooks Rehabilitation’s Neuro Recovery Center, told NBC News that therapists aren’t sure of the potential Joel has, as he has never had proper physical therapy before. The center is continuing to work with Joel to help him regain strength and body movement.

The couple sells paintings and other artwork that Joel creates on their blog, and they hope to raise money for a home that Joel can comfortably live in. They currently live with his father as neither one has been able to return to work. Prior to his accident, Lauren had studied interior design and Joel had gone to culinary school, according to their blog.

I'm An Introvert. Can I Hide At My Own Wedding?

Dear Demure Dawn,
If it weren’t your boyfriend (fiancé?) who wanted a wedding—if it were your mother, future mother-in-law, or best friend—I’d say skip it and elope. But because the desire has been expressed by the one other person who is most intimately involved, this is one of those times when you have to grin (or grimace) and bear it.
But “a wedding” is a generic term for an event that you can meld to your own needs, desires, and preferences; it needn’t be a full-out veil-and-flower-girl event with dinner, speeches, and a band playing hits of the 1980s. Once you have decided to have “a wedding,” you and your boyfriend can sit down and imagine what sort of experience will feel right and genuine for you both. Can you compromise on the size of the wedding so that the people who are showering you with attention are those with whom you feel most connected? Perhaps something casual, like a backyard barbecue-cum-wedding ceremony, will feel good. Or a clam bake, if you’re in clam bake territory. If you and your nearest and dearest can afford it, a destination weddingwill naturally limit the turnout since not everyone will be able to manage the trip. An afternoon tea-and-cake receptioncan be fairly quick and painless.
Nor are you required to wear a big froufrou white dress if you don’t want to—those do tend to draw a lot of attention. Your wedding, your dress. You decide what will make you feel beautiful rather than uncomfortable.
Wherever you decide to have the wedding, there’s nothing wrong with scoping out a place in the venue where you can escape for a breather when you need to (the bathroom may or may not work, depending on the likelihood of running into doting friends or relatives in there). Halfway through their wedding, one couple I spoke to for Introverts in Love slipped off to the kitchen for a break while the catering staff, too busy to pay them any mind, bustled around them. (I assume they weren’t in anyone’s way. Or maybe they were, but it was their wedding, so that’s the way it goes.)
The wedding you have is limited only by your budget, your imagination, and your ability to reach a compromise with your boyfriend—and certainly now is as good a time as any to practice this essential skill for a solid marriage.
And one last thought: I believe that events such as weddings and graduations are once-in-a-lifetime moments that allow us to pause to celebrate milestones and appreciate where we are in life. If all goes according to plan (and I trust it will), you will have just one wedding. I hope you can create it and frame it mentally in such a way as to approach it with joy rather than dread and accept openheartedly the love that people want to show you as you embark on this new chapter.

After my wedding (afternoon wedding in a park building, 120 guests, DJ, my husband’s rock band, barbecue buffet, frozen-margarita machine, tea-length dress made with love by my dressmaker mother, no bridesmaids or groomsmen, and a ceremony so brief some people blinked and missed it), it occurred to me that I would never again have all those friends and loved ones together in one place. So, exhausting as it was, 24 years later I am thoroughly rested up from it and don’t regret for a minute the time, money (we paid for it ourselves), and energy expended.

Natick Praying Indians celebrate wedding for history books

A group of men beat on a large drum at the front of Eliot Church. About 100 tribe members turn their backs to the drummers and face the back of the church as WarriorWoman and StrongMedicine Bear walk through a set of doors, each holding a large feather.
Suddenly, a chant begins and the two, holding hands and in tribal dress, stop momentarily at the end of the church aisle and face their tribe.
In unison, the two lovers begin dancing together up the aisle where they meet Chief Caring Hands.
WarriorWoman and StrongMedicine Bear are getting married.
But unlike other Praying Indian wedding ceremonies, WarriorWoman and StrongMedicine Bear’s wedding is one for the history books.
The couple’s recent ceremony became the first Natick Praying Indian wedding at Eliot Church in 340 years.
“To be here and surrounded by family on this day is no mistake,” said Chief Caring Hands, who officiated the ceremony.
The ceremony was the first Praying Indian wedding held at the Eliot Church in 340 years. The Praying Indians once worshipped and held wedding ceremonies at the Eliot Church regularly when the church’s founder and former reverend John Eliot brought them to settle in Natick in 1651.
In the 1670s, a Wampanoag leader attacked white settlers. The attack instilled fear in the settlers and tribal movements in the area were restricted. Some tribes, including the Praying Indians, were banished to Deer Island, where many of them died.
StrongMedicine Bear is a descendant of several tribe members who were banished.
StrongMedicine Bear, whose given name is Shawn Silva, is also one of 12 children belonging to Chief Caring Hands, also known as Rosita Andrews. He and WarriorWoman - or Lisa Carlson - have two children together alongside children from previous marriages.
The ceremony including a ceremonial dance entrance and exit, an opening speech from Chief Caring Hands, singing and an exchange of vows.
“You have taught me how to love,” said WarriorWoman in her vows.
“I had lost my rib and you have made me complete,” said StrongMedicine Bear in his vows, a nod to the Eve’s origin tale in the Bible, when God created her from Adam’s rib.
For StrongMedicine Bear, the ceremony held special significance.
“To stand here, to get married here, where John Eliot preached, where my ancestors worshipped, is extremely meaningful,” said StrongMedicine Bear. “This is not only for me but for my future and my children so that they too can now get married here.”
StrongMedicine Bear designed and sewed Warrior Woman’s dress for the ceremony. He was also sporting new full arm length tattoos specifically designed and tattooed for the ceremony.
“I saw these in a vision,” said StrongMedicine Bear.

The church ceremony was private, but a public ceremony and “grand entry” was held at the Natick Praying Indian annual powwow event at Cochituate State Park.

Weddings: Succulents lend rustic, elegant chic to modern weddings

Succulents are showing up everywhere in the world of weddings, from bouquets and boutonnieres to centerpieces and even take-home favors.
They're dainty yet hardy, and come in a surprising array of colors and textures. Best of all, they're eco-friendly and can be replanted at home after your nuptials as a reminder of the special day.
"Succulents add a modern look," says Viva Max Kaley, a New York-based wedding planner. "Instead of pretty petals, it's a cool geometric use of lines. My clients tend to gravitate toward that aesthetic, so it's been a really popular choice."
Robbin Watson, a 27-year-old living in Boston who is getting married in Connecticut next July, is using succulents to add a pop of dusty blue and mint green to her cream-colored bridal and bridesmaid bouquets.
But while she loves their aesthetic, succulents are more of a sentimental choice for her.
"I lived on the West Coast for a few years with my fiancé, where succulents are very prevalent. Not so much in the New England region, where I live now," Watson says. "To bring a little West Coast into my wedding ceremony, I thought succulents would be a great way to incorporate my memories of living in San Diego."
Bouquets like Watson's are the most obvious and popular way to use succulents in weddings.
Debra Prinzing, Seattle-based author and founder of the eco-conscious floral directory siteSlowFlowers.com, says the trend has been popular among California brides for years but has really taken off thanks to social media sites like Pinterest and Instagram.
Demand for drought-hardy succulents in the gardening world has also made these once hard-to-find plants readily available year-round across the U.S., and at a cheaper price than more traditional wedding flowers like roses and peonies.
Taylor Cassard, a 27-year-old nursing student in Montana, used a variety of light green rosette-shaped succulents from the Echeveria family in her bouquet for a rustic yet modern look when she got married at a guest ranch in Big Sky this summer.
"They were absolutely gorgeous and mixed so nicely with the other flowers to create a soft natural look," says Cassard, who planted some of the succulents post-ceremony in metal buckets used by her flower children.
Many wedding florists recommend sprinkling succulents among traditional flowers rather than creating an all-succulent bouquet, which can get heavy and bulky-looking. The plants' vibrant green and sometimes purple colors pair especially well with jewel tones, burgundy and apricot shades. According to Prinzing, succulents are a particularly nice complement to dahlias, hydrangeas, lilies, orchids, roses and spring bulb flowers.
BOUTONNIERES AND CENTERPIECES
Succulents can feel like a more "masculine" floral accent and have become a popular choice for boutonnieres as a result, says Anastasia Stevenson, a wedding planner and founder of the website How to DIY Wedding.
They're sturdy and can stand up to the rigors of being pinned to a jacket that's tossed about all day. Succulents make good corsages for the same reason.
Cassard used a mix of small, rosette-shaped succulents and wild grasses for rustic-yet-elegant boutonnieres, sprinkling the plants throughout her reception area that night as table centerpieces and cake accents.
Rosette-shaped Echeverias like those Cassard used work well as centerpieces because they can grow up to a foot in diameter, according to Prinzing.
OTHER USES
How about succulents as jewelry? Wiring and flower glue are keys to this recent bridal trend, which includes everything from rings and necklaces to bracelets and headpieces, says Prinzing.
Other couples have said their vows before a wall of succulents or used them as eco-friendly wedding favors — a parting gift that's "unlikely to be tossed in the trash when the guests arrive home," says New York-based wedding-trends expert and editor Anne Chertoff.
And succulents aren't just for people.

"I know of one creative designer who offers floral dog collars for her wedding parties," Prinzing says. "Succulents are ideal for this situation because they withstand canine activities that are probably more lively than a groom or bride's movements during a ceremony."

Royal pain in the wedding

To say I was pleased we were the first to arrive would be an understatement. It wasn’t until my cheeks began to ache that I realized how hard I’d been grinning. It made sense, my smile — things had worked out according to plan, which meant that there was some order in the world. I like order.
I scanned the tables on the patio and, after some consideration, placed my purse on what I deemed to be the optimal seat. Set with its back against the line of grass, this chair would grant me a comfortable view of the entire party. It was also located directly beneath the sole umbrella.
By the time the next guests appeared, I was relaxing with a mimosa in hand, along with David, his brother Dana, and Dana’s daughter Becca, those who chose to ride with me. The rest of the family was still back at Robin’s, the house in which all eight of us (nine, if you count our hostess) were staying for the wedding weekend.
David referred to it as the family’s “royal wedding.” It was a fair description. There were 10 bridesmaids, 10 groomsmen, and 200 guests, some of whom traveled from Australia. There were also two outdoor tents; though, calling them tents is like calling American Pharoah a horse. The bride, who descends from Eastern European aristocracy, looked like Sleeping Beauty’s Princess Aurora, with her long blond hair and tall, slender form. She’s from the side of David’s family that comes with painted portraits of ancestors, a coat of arms, and a family tree dating back to the early 1600s.
The wedding was just one of several events scheduled to take place over three days. There was a greeting party on Friday night, when a hundred or so people gathered at the Gibson in Washington DC On Saturday, the ceremony and reception were held at the bride’s parents’ home in Potomac. And Sunday, there were two brunches (one downtown; the other, where I sat with my mimosa, in Potomac), and then a barbecue at a family member’s farm, just a 45-minute drive away in Maryland’s horse country.
As the date approached, my anxiety mounted. I wasn’t worried about the wedding; that would be fine and lovely. My apprehension was focused on the family, particularly the stress of dealing with a large group of individuals who each had their own idea about how things should be done. In short, I feared having no control.
Before the greeting party at the Gibson, our immediate family (David, his siblings, niece, parents, aunt, and cousin-in-law Robin) would be having dinner at a restaurant. There had been talk of taking the metro into town. “I just don’t want to be trapped,” I said to David as we were dressing for dinner. I had some minor pushback from others when I shared my plan to go back to the house, change, and then take an Uber. Some wondered why I wouldn’t just wear one outfit for the evening. Others pointed out that the restaurant was closer to the bar, and still another added that everyone else was taking the metro, and why wouldn’t I want to go with everyone else?
“I can’t believe this is only just occurring to me, but I think I’ve pinpointed the root of every family issue,” I said. “Every single conflict can be boiled down into one underlying problem, and that’s one person in the family not being happy with another person’s choices. It’s that whole, ‘gap between expectation and reality’ thing. Whether it’s a hobby, or what they do for a living, who they date, or what they choose to believe in. Everyone wants everyone else to make the same choices they do, and when others choose differently, there’s disappointment, and that disappointment breeds discord.”
I applied my new philosophy to the situation at hand. “Everyone has an opinion about how and when I should get to the Gibson, and they all think theirs is the best,” I said. “You know what? I have this car for the weekend. I’m happy to give rides to whoever needs one, so long as I get to come and go when I want to come and go.” Because David knows that few things stress me out as much as being late or feeling cornered by someone else’s schedule, he agreed that my plan was good for staving off anxiety.
And it worked. The weekend was stress-free (for me, at least), and the wedding was as perfect and magical as a fairy-tale ending. The brunch we chose to attend had been scheduled for noon on Sunday, at a place about 15 minutes away from Robin’s. The venue was unknown to me, and unknowns make me nervous. It puts me at ease to have a little buffer, a bit of extra time to scout and adjust. When the family gathered for coffee that morning, I announced, “I’ll be leaving at 11:30. Anyone who wants to ride with me is welcome.”
At 12:10, when David’s parents, aunt, and sister arrived, I was on my second mimosa. When the clouds dissipated and the sun beat down on the patio, those who hadn’t thought to bring sunglasses squinted uncomfortably; some formed their hands into makeshift visors. I leaned over to Becca, who shared my shade from the umbrella over our table and said, “Aren’t you glad you came with me?” She was. Thirty minutes later, the clouds returned and grew dark, and then the sky opened. People abandoned their food and rushed to gather beneath the overhang by the bar. Becca and I remained in our seats, dry, thanks to the umbrella, and continued to sip until the downpour ended.

“You know, lots of people tell me I’m too uptight about time,” I said to my 21-year-old niece. “But you know what?” I gestured around us and smiled. “It pays to be early.” Becca nodded in agreement as we clinked glasses.

Saving For A Wedding When You Make 53 Cents A Day

The thought of paying for her daughters' weddings has haunted Kamala Rani for years. When it came time for her older daughter to get married two years ago, she was up against the biggest cost of her life: $320.
This might seem like peanuts to an American audience used to hearing about weddings costing tens of thousands. But consider this: Rani and her family in Bangladesh each live on the equivalent of about $1.50 a day, treading a very thin line between deep and extreme poverty.
Last month, the United Nations approved a plan aimed at wiping out poverty. Rani, who told us her story by phone, knows what it's like to live in deep poverty. Despite her extremely limited means, she still managed to throw a good party, she says.
Each day, Rani wakes up in her one-room, 10-square-foot home at 6 a.m. to an already noisy village, punctuated by a Muslim call to prayer.
She lives the village of Rishipara, which roughly translates to "untouchable neighborhood," outside the market town of Kapasia in Bangladesh.
Rani, 48, and her family are in the Rishi caste, also known as the "downtrodden." It's the lowest caste, and members of it were historically regarded as "impure" or "untouchable," relegated to jobs like leather-working and sweeping streets. Their home has corrugated tin walls and roofing. There isn't an outhouse, so they use their neighbor's.
Rani primarily works in the market sorting vegetables for shopkeepers, but she also works as a housemaid. Since her husband was injured a few years ago loading rice sacks, she is the primary earner and money manager in her family, bringing in about 53 cents a day. According to a calculation that economists use to define poverty levels, that's about the equivalent of living on $1.50 per person a day in the U.S. Rani often borrows money interest-free from neighbors to help make ends meet.
She works from around 7 a.m. until sometime between 8 and 10 p.m., depending on her housemaid duties or when the market bustle winds down. For dinner, she eats rice and vegetables or lentils and small curried fish, if she can afford it. Her favorite food is freshly soaked soybeans, fried in oil. Rani buys more when food prices are low and less when prices are high. At the end of the day, she bathes in the Shitalakshya river before returning home to her family — her husband and two of her three living children.
Her fourth child died recently after he fell ill one day. He had argued with an older boy in the neighborhood, and that boy had just died suddenly.
"So, we thought it was a curse from that," Rani explains. "Because of this quarrel, he came back to haunt my son."
They took Rani's son to a faith healer but he didn't get better. They had planned to take him to the hospital — it's a 15-minute walk away — but he died in the morning before they had the chance.
These days, Rani's daughters occupy her mind. Specifically, their weddings.
Rani's biggest financial feat was paying for her teenage daughter's wedding — a daylong event two years ago with 40 guests that cost about $320, plus a gram of gold as a dowry. To pay for it, she saved up a small amount of money and then repeatedly lent her savings to neighbors and friends, charging them interest on the loan. She borrowed the gold for the dowry from her sister-in-law, who will demand it back when it's time for her own daughter's wedding. She took a microcredit loan from an NGO to pay for the chicken and rice meal and the tables.
"It was a big feast. The [Hindu] priest came to officiate and everyone dressed up in their best clothes," she says. "It was a very happy event. We covered everything with cloth to make it look good." Cooks made chicken and rice with oil in big aluminum pots. A traditional band played and sang, with drums, cymbals and pipes. The party lasted late into the night. "It kept everybody awake," she says.
That daughter now lives in a nearby village. To visit her, Rani saves bus money in an unglazed ceramic pot with a slit in the top, breaking it when it's time to make the $3 round trip. Her last visit was about six months ago. She's still paying off loans for the wedding.
Even though there are eight years until her younger daughter reaches the legal marriage age, Rani says she lies awake at night wondering how she'll pay for her wedding.

But, she says, there's no option to do it any other way, "because that's what a marriage is."

Wedding 101: 4 lessons from student couples

When it comes to wedding planning, you probably wouldn’t ask a college student for advice.
The percentage of adults in the U.S. who have never been married “is at an historic high,”according to a Pew Reserach Center study released in 2014. And adults who do marry are marrying later in life: The median age at first marriage, it reports, is now 27 for women and 29 for men, up from 20 for women and 23 for men in 1960.
“It’s definitely out of the norm to be married at 21,” says Kasandra Hays, a college senior at Brigham Young University who married her husband Brandon this past summer. “So many people say to me, ‘But you’re so young!’ Or, ‘You have so much more to do with your life!’ As if life was suddenly over when I got married.
“But no one ever talks about how strengthening a marriage can be. In fact, I feel like I need it in my life now more than ever. College is stressful enough, full of decisions to make and things do. This constant, reliable relationship is just what Brandon and I need. It builds us both up; we support each other in our crazy dreams, and we get to chase them together.”
Planning a wedding, though, whether one or both partners are in school, can be a particularly daunting task that includes the juggling of academics, work, family obligations and fluctuating college budgets.
But with a little organization and a lot of love, these four couples were able to balance going to school and planning their “I Dos.”
Check out their crash course in wedding planning below!
Wyntre and Michael, both 20, are high school sweethearts in the middle of planning their wedding. The two got engaged last September and are planning their wedding while attending Southern Utah University in Cedar City, Utah.
“When you’re planning a wedding, there is so much to try and focus on,” says Wyntre. “You want to be in love and spend all of your time going on cute dates and planning the perfect wedding, but you also need sleep. And to do homework. And get good grades. And work. And plan for your lives after the wedding day. Life gets extra chaotic and it can be exceptionally frustrating to feel stretched in 10 different directions.
“In all of that, it’s important to remember you’re a team! And this wedding is a team effort.”
One thing she and Michael recommend is dividing wedding responsibilities by interests.
“For example, I’m exceptionally picky about the photographer. I’ve called at least nine as of today,” Wyntre says. “So Michael is handling figuring out the wedding colors, so that I don’t have to stress out about it. The things that are important to me (like the photographer) he hands off unless I ask his opinion, and the same goes for him being able to choose what is important to him.”
Joe and Kaela met through their church congregation, doing Hurricane Sandy clean up in the Rockaways, N.Y. They got engaged about a year later in early November 2013.
At the time, Joe was starting his junior year at Columbia University in New York, while Kaela was beginning an apprenticeship at Pierre Michel beauty salon, also in Manhattan.
When it came to planning, the two were careful to be realistic about what their school and work schedules actually allowed them to do. So while Joe was extremely busy with school during their engagement, Kaela’s job gave her a little more room to breathe.
“I took the reins on planning,” she says, “It wasn’t as difficult for me, because I was more able to balance my time (between work and wedding planning). And I enjoyed it — it became my hobby for the time we were engaged!
“We also had a lot of help from family and friends, and a long enough engagement — 7 months — to plan everything. We used breaks from school and weekends to plan. And we scheduled to have everything planned long before exams.”
Bonus tip: “Don’t plan on getting too much done during finals!”
When Challis and Taylor, both 21, first got engaged last June, they had the extra difficulty of having to plan a wedding long distance. At the time, Taylor was enrolled full-time in a summer semester at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah, while Challis was working in Idaho Falls, Idaho.
“Summer classes were fairly simple,” Taylor says. “But it was hard to be far from her.”
In order to balance his time, Taylor focused on completing all his schoolwork during the week so that he could spend the weekends in Idaho – time he used in part to plan the wedding. The two also did a lot of wedding planning over Skype.
Even living temporarily in different states, the Taylor and Challis found ways to make time for each other during the planning process.
“We had a lot of fun and valuable learning experiences as we painted signs for the reception together, planned the honeymoon together, and made decisions on the wedding and our future together,” Challis said.
“I think our society sometimes makes marriages all about the decorations, the colors, the cake, the dress, the flowers, etc. Although those are all a fun part of the tradition, the actual ceremony and your choice to marry have much farther reaching effects than that of what kind of flowers are in your bouquet.”
Kiefer and Alex had known each other since they were 13, but didn’t start dating until six years later. They got engaged last Valentine’s Day.
At the time, Alex, 21, was working full-time at the Huntsman Cancer Hospital and going to school at Westminster College in Salt Lake City, Utah. Kiefer was working as an EMT as well as pursuing his advanced EMT license.
“I started a Pinterest page the day after I got engaged in February to get an idea of what I wanted the wedding to look like early on,” says Alex. “But because we were so busy with school, I didn’t really do much besides just daydream about the wedding until June.”
Her spring semester, Alex had a full course load, including bioorganic chemistry, physiology, and a particularly time intensive theater class. “I’m pretty serious about getting good grades,” she says. “So I knew I couldn’t put planning the wedding before school.
“That’s why I’m really happy I planned my wedding for the very end of the summer. It gave me a lot of time to plan without having to balance work, school and a wedding all at once.”

Alex adds, “Though I’d always imagined a June wedding, my August wedding was wonderful and I definitely wouldn’t want to jeopardize my grades because I was distracted. And for us, summer turned out to be enough time to plan! Our wedding turned out wonderfully.”